


Crystal Stares And Cloudy Conundrums

by myrtleandmercury



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Real Person Fiction
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Fluff, How Do I Tag, M/M, Mutual Pining, Phil Lester Is A Sweetheart, Pining Dan Howell, Vampire Dan Howell, Witch Phil Lester
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-16
Packaged: 2019-06-10 20:31:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15299466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myrtleandmercury/pseuds/myrtleandmercury
Summary: 'There is life on earth - one life, which embraces every animal and plant on the planet. Time has divided it up into several million parts, but each is an integral part of the whole. A rose is a rose, but it is also a robin and a rabbit. We are all of one flesh, drawn from the same crucible.'- Lyall Watson,Or, Dan is a confused vampire and Phil just wants to hug him.





	1. New Schools And Vibrant Flowers

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This has been stuck in my head for ages so I'm really excited to get it down onto laptop-paper. This is also my first fanfiction on AO3, so I hope you enjoy ^_^

'Let life be an adventure. Live your life to the fullest, unfettered by fear of the ghosts and goblins of what might occur. Calamity and death happen as well to those who hide from life as to those who squeeze every drop of zest from it.'  
-Jonathan Lockwood Huie

 

When Dan had been enrolled into the National School of Peculiar and Paranormal Beings (or, NSPPB) he had been expecting looming obsidian towers, darkened and wizened forests and ivy-smothered cobblestone castles, with at least a couple centaurs prowling the gloomy grounds. However, as he stepped from the pale schoolbus onto sundried concrete, he was met with an eggshell coloured building, with iron gates barricading the exits and a small garden blooming what seemed like a million brightly coloured herbs. Students with bored expressions and heavy bookbags milled around the building like wasps, all wearing the same identical blue shirt and white trousers Dan himself had been forced to don. The school seemed- about as ordinary and boring as a school could be.

Dan sighed, not sure whether he should feel relieved or disappointed. One thing he was sure of, was that it was going to be a long year.

Daniel Howell had spent the past sixteen years living in a secluded and tiny village on the outskirts of Reading, England, where he was often found either holed up in his room playing video games on his old Dell laptop (gifted to him when he was like, 5), or laying by the pebble beaches, either staring out to the river or reading whatever new sci-fi novel that had arrived in the local library the day earlier. His life was to say, extremely boring.

Dan wishes that he’d cherished this boredom while he could still bask in its safety and average-ness because, at age fifteen, it had all gone wrong.

It had first begun when he’d fallen over on his bike, distracted by the scarlet sunrise, and had gained a long red cut stretching up the side of his leg, only for the same cut to disappear when he arrived home just minutes later. From there onwards it had been a plummet into peculiar events, loud noises and suddenly too-bright lights causing desperate gasps in the boy's bathroom, sudden desperate cravings for something he seemed to never be able to obtain, and a seemingly constant rushing of blood in his ears.  
Most peculiarly had been his teeth though. Dan had been born with teeth as a baby, pearly whites that he made sure to take care of while growing up suddenly began to change when he hit puberty. His canines gradually began to grow pointed and longer, so that he had to make a conscious effort to keep them hidden behind his lips. That, combined with deathly pale skin and hollowed eyes as Dan seemed to be turning into an insomniac, made him natural prey for the bullies at the local crappy public school.

In fact, those bullies were the reason he’d ended up at NSPBB boarding school anyway. They’d been pushing him around for a while until Dan finally decided to shove them back- and accidentally sent one of them flying through the air. That seemed to be the final straw for both his Mum and the school- his ansty behaviour and frequent absences and now this earning him an expulsion from school, and his Mother finally decided to look into his queer behaviour.

It took months of google searches, library checks and one incredibly awkward visit to the ‘all-knower’ (a creepy middle-aged man with a massive dog that drooled all over Dan’s black jeans) a few towns over until his mother had finally found the school. It was pretty far away, located on the outskirts of wales, but it all seemed legit and his mother was more than happy to send him on his way.   
(she would never admit it, but Dan knew she was scared of him)

So with a kiss planted on her cheek and a promise to write home as frequently as possible, Dan had boarded a train set for wales and travelled the rest of the way by bus to a quiet town that had looked nothing like he had been preparing himself for.

'well this looks to be exciting’, Dan thought sourly to himself, kicking his suitcase along and beginning the walk to the drab building's doors. He could practically feel the intense gaze of students lingering around in the courtyard, piercing eyes boring into the back of his skull as if to read his mind and find out what kind of freakshow he was inside. The journey to the front desk was only a few feet away, but for Dan under the scrutinizing gaze of his future classmates, it seemed like miles away.

The interior school seemed almost exactly like what one would expect from the outside, stark yellow wallpaper smothered brick walls, posters and tack boards were dotted around the room like aphids on a plant, and pressed securely against the wall was a plastic reception desk. The receptionist herself paid no mind to Dan, earplugs jammed firmly in bronze ears and wild dark hair covering what seemed to be a third of her face. She looked to be in her late twenties but already seemed to have given into the boredom that came with growing up.

“U-uh hi”, Dan coughed nervously,“I'm Daniel Howell, I was wondering if you could please give me a timetable and my form room number?”

The receptionist remained unresponsive, one green tinted finger curling around her copper hair. Dan felt his ears burning a sharp crimson. Tentatively, he reached out and tapped her lightly on the shoulder.

She whirled around immediately, a harsh scowl set upon her dark features, twisting her ebony skin and emerald freckles into a menacing stare. She seemed to relax when her golden eyes caught sight of Dan, plucking the earbuds from her ears then leaning back into her plastic doctor’s chair and picking at her nails.

“What do you want?”, she snapped, glancing disapprovingly at his untucked shirt and loose tie.

“H-hi, I'm Daniel Howell and I'm new to NSPPB. I was uh- I was wondering if you could maybe give me my timetable and, uh, form room number?” 

She stared at him as if he was a total idiot. Dan fidgeted under her intense gaze, beginning to truly feel like one. This woman seemed able to give someone nightmares if she tried.  
But then, harsh features seemed to melt into something else- not quite kind, but nowhere near as cruel as before. She sighed, sifting through a clump of papers on her desk, before drawing out Dan's application letter. 

“Figures I’d be the one to deal with the complete newbie”, She groaned, putting the letter down and flicking up her eyes to meet Dan's gaze once more.

“Look, Spaniel, or whatever your name is, from what I’ve heard about your.. condition, no-one in your family, and I'm willing to bet the town too, has any idea what’s going on. Correct?”

“Uh-yeah. I mean, no. Wait, I mean-”

 

The receptionist cut him off with a wave of her green hand, eyes raking through the words on his letter as if they could hold the key to an unlimited coffee stash.

“Insomnia, susceptible to loud noises and lights, sudden inhuman strength and speed, sometimes animalistic behaviour-”

Dan looked down at his feet, his whole face ablaze.

“Any seizures lately? Have you found your body changing in much more peculiar ways than just the teeth and acne?”

“No, ma'am”

“Peggy” the receptionist commented, before crossing off a couple points from a spreadsheet absentmindedly dropped on her desk. 

“Well, Dan,” she continued in the same bored tone, “seems like you’re going through what we call ‘vampire puberty’ “.

Dan froze. He wasn't an idiot of course, and he’d run the thought through his head billions of times before, both during the long energetic nights, and the dull exhausted days. Mythical creatures weren’t ignored in the small area he’d grown up in, and everyone knew a fair amount about them, bud they’d been treated like just that- myths. Hell, he’d even signed up for a school dealing with ‘different’ students. But hearing the words out loud, with no Esc key or way out, seemed to cement what he’d entertained himself as many times before. Dan felt as though someone had tipped a bucket of ice cold water over his head, snapping him into a harsh reality while still providing him relief- he finally understood what he was- a vampire.

With a start, Dan noticed that the woman was still droning on, not seeming to care that he was completely spaced out.

“-Ourse, we’ve had to adjust your timetable to one suited for your nocturnal nature, so its best you head up to your room now. You’ll be staying on the third floor, room no.4. Classes start at 11 pm Monday.”

Dan smiled nervously and nodded his head, quickly turning and practically running towards the twin glass doors leading to the rest of the building.

“And Dan? Have a nice time at NSBBP.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………

When Dan had pushed open the wooden ebony door leading to his shared dorm, this was the opposite to what he had been expecting. He’d been setting himself up for another drab room, minimal possessions and grey curtains, with his room-mate (hopefully) nowhere in sight.

This room, however, was an entirely different story.

Astronomy posters dotted the bright blue walls like constellations, while drooping plants and discarded crystals laid haphazardly on a teal desk in the corner of the room, illuminated by the soft amber light of a small crystal lamp. Various necklaces dripped like rainfall from ajar drawers, while a few dream catchers hung in-between thousands of glow in the stars (which Dan was sure weren't allowed), softly swaying in a seemingly invisible breeze. His room-mate had clearly tried to keep the mess onto his own side of the room, but a few stars and the odd cacti still spilt onto Dan's side, like paint onto tissue paper left lying forgotten on a desk. 

His room-mate themself lay lying fast asleep on a green and blue chequered duvet, only a few strands of dark hair leaking onto a soft looking pillow, the cotton sheets moving rhythmically with the soft breathing the figure was emitting. Dan was just about to quietly leave and explore the grounds, deciding to wait until his room-mate woke up (he had no idea what they were able to do, and he’d rather not find out by being a creepy figure in the bedroom) when he saw it. 

Just above his room-mate bed, taking up nearly a quarter of the wall and almost impossible to miss, hung a giant poster of a young girl brandishing a pistol and surrounded by gruesome corpses, reaching desperately towards her. Below the woman was a golden slogan, imprinted in a spider’s scrawl, Buffy the vampire slayer.

Shit.

………………………………………………………

Deciding to leave his heavy luggage in the room, dan quickly retreats, closing the wooden door quietly before leaning against it with a sigh. Okay, so vampire slayers were apparently a thing. Which meant monster racism (vamp-cism??? Spoop-cism???) was also a thing. And, oh god, this meant his roommate was a vamp-cist. Dan sighed once more, letting his head drop softly against the thin wood. Given his luck, he shouldn’t even be surprised by this turn of events, his life seemed to be constantly plagued by unfortunate events and regrettable actions. Maybe this was a vampire thing?

(it probably wasn’t, but Dan would prefer to blame it on that than his own shitty luck)

'whatever’ Dan thought to himself, shaking his head a little and pushing off from the door. He’d just had a long journey here and a very awkward encounter with the receptionist, he may as well try and explore the grounds as much as possible to avoid looking like a total newbie tomorrow (and to at least try and clear his swirling mind).

While NSPPB seemed very dull and bleak from the outside, once you got a proper look at the grounds it was actually quite beautiful. The inside of the school was beige and sterile, but the outside seemed to burst with light and colour. Bindweed wrapped itself around the painted iron fence enclosing the school from the outside world, the pearlescent flowers resembling tissue paper ruffling slightly in the soft breeze sweeping the grounds. Fewer students hung around the front of the school now, flitting off to their next classes already, leaving a melancholy and quiet atmosphere of a silent school in their wake. The light shadows of lilac clouds played upon the eggshell walls of the building, silhouetted by the sinking sun, drifting quietly and softly to their next location. 

However, the garden on the eastern side of the school was by far the most beautiful enclosure.

Dan had noticed it before, but to him, it had seemed like a bunch of pastel herbs he didn’t know the name and purpose of. However, now he was closer he could clearly see the blooming flowers in all their vibrancy: towering pink poppies (Pink anemone, the small steel plaque at the bottom of the garden listed), stood confidently above the rest, seeming ready to give protection to the other plants. Pale green rosemary stood together in small clusters, dotted around the edges of the bed while thyme poured over the edges, colourful emerald leaves seizing as much sunlight as possible. Vivid cornflowers complemented golden marigolds, along with a dozen other vibrant herbs dan knew he would never be able to remember the names of, not even if he started learning them now and for the next thousand years.

The garden was, quite honestly, the best part of his move so far.


	2. First Meetings And Sharp Pencils

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm planning to have a regular upload schedule, about two chapters per week. But for now, enjoy this one!
> 
> First meetings !! Tell me what you think :3

'There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that is your own self' Adolus Huxley

By the time Dan had arrived back at his shared dormitory, the sun had been replaced by a silver moon and violet sky, a thousand sparkling stars seeming to light his way home. More important than the sky, however, was his sudden energy, as if the night was becoming more familiar than the day. The gnawing feeling in his stomach was back and as painful as ever, but somehow, he still felt comforted by the dark clouds above.

The doors to the dorm swung open swiftly with barely a creak, and Dan was glad to finally collapse on his bed, breathing in deeply so the unfamiliar (but strangely comforting) smell of hotel bedsheets filled his nostrils. He sighed contentedly, burrowing into his duvet until a quiet voice snapped him from the bliss of bed.

“Uh, hi?” 

Dan snapped upright, a small gasp of surprise leaving his lips as his eyes quickly ran to the other side of the room, where his room-mate stood awkwardly.

He was almost as tall as Dan (practically a sasquatch already) and held himself in the same uncomfortable manner: slender arms clutching the other and body stood ramrod straight, his posture radiating awkwardness. They could almost be a mirror image of each other, although this stranger was easily better looking than Dan thought himself.

He had pearly white skin, smoothly covering his body and the pale tint a clear result of far too little time outside the house. His skin was a bright contrast to his raven black hair, falling softly towards his left eyebrow. It was scruffy and clearly dyed, but he somehow still managed to pull it off effortlessly (Dan knew if he attempted the same look he’d look like a demented jackdaw). He had a thin face, dotted by faint brown freckles, and a strangely shaped nose that should have looked unattractive but seemed to suit him just right and added to his clear uniqueness. Most vivid, however, were his startling sapphire eyes, clear and honest, framed by a set of thick black glasses sliding ever so slightly down his smooth nose. Dan resists the urge to reach out and push them back up and reminds himself that this person is a complete stranger, and more importantly, his room-mate for the next few years, so it's probably best if he doesn't act like a complete weirdo on their first meeting.

Dan coughed into his fist, already feeling the telltale warmth of what was surely a scarlet blush creeping up his neck, soon to paint his cheeks a cherry red.

“Hi”, he greeted, his voice cracking, “Um, I’m Dan. I just moved here- to this school- today”.

The stranger's eyes sparkled with recognition. “Oh! They did tell me to expect you, I just didn’t think it would be so soon.” 

He looked around nervously “Uh, sorry about the mess. I’ve been here all summer and kinda forgot I'd be getting a room-mate. But I can clean everything up if it bothers you!”.

Dan smiled, warmth cracking his lips into an upward grin. “Hey, it's fine. It adds character to the room. Plus, it’s the only area in the entire school that seems to have colours other than brown and beige”, he joked.

His room-mate nodded furiously, “Oh my gosh, I’m not the only one who hates that! Its like they couldn’t afford more than three different paints to colour the school with.”

“Or they accidentally hired a colour-blind person to design the school, but decided to keep the scheme because, ‘hey, why not remind the students they’ll be living in a mini prison until the summer holidays?’”.

His room-mate giggled, flopping back onto his mussed bed with a small sigh.

“Unfortunately, the teachers aren’t much better either. I usually end up picturing them as distressed bees when I get bored during class.”

Dan stifled a snort and mirrored his room-mates actions, melting into his sterile white sheets and thin cushions.

“Thanks for the advice.. er..” Dan paused awkwardly, realising he’d forgotten to ask the strangers name. Jeez, insult his school then forget to ask his name. So much for good first impressions. Luckily his roommate didn’t seem to mind, rolling over so he faced Dan and outstretching a slender hand.

“Phil Lester”.

Dan grinned again, grasping the offered hand and shaking it slightly. It slotted perfectly into his own.

“Nice to meet you, Phil.”

 

……………………………

Caught up in turquoise eyes and tender smiles, Dan only remembers the poster, looming on Phil’s side of the room like thunderclouds on a sunny day, until late that morning.

………………………...

Lessons start unfairly sooner than they should, and in what seems like only a matter of minutes Dan is already plonked down in a harsh plastic chair, his head resting on his hands while he stares with glazed over eyes at the teacher, who has been droning on about the correct use of semicolons for what seems like the past three hours. The other students in his class have already nodded off, with their heads burrowed into crossed hands, while the other few still managing to stay awake are staring intensely at the small grey clock mounted on the brick wall, where the second hand seems to be trying to move through treacle.  
Dan sighs, letting his heavy eyelids droop as he slumps down further into his uncomfortable chair.

Dan has been attending school at NSPPB for a little less than a week, and much to his disappointment (yet sight relief) the classes are pretty much the same compared to a normal school’s classes, excluding some change in certain subjects.  
Students are still forced to attend subjects such as English, maths and science, but other ones like home ec have been replaced with herbology and the wide history of monsters, while physical education is tailored to each different creature’s abilities. (Dan knows that although p.e is much easier being a vampire, he still skips almost every lesson).

However, the worst part about this school wasn't the aggravatingly long lessons, nor the dull colour scheme, it was by far the food he was forced to digest. On his second day of the school, he’d been taken aside and forced to show off his ‘abilities’: Performing a three hour long triathlon (Dan was certain he’d almost ended up in a coma after that was finished), a mini test on magical history and spells (Dan was pretty sure he’d failed so spectacularly at that one, it wasn't even funny) and, worst of all, the appetite test.

Despite his unadulterated loathing for sports and anything test- related, the triathlon wasn’t too difficult with his new powers, and the quiz only lasted half an hour before his examiner realised he knew absolutely nothing. No, the real horror was the last test, where Dan had been fed so many different types of foods, drunk so much ‘wine’ (Dan absolutely refused to believe the sticky red substance was anything other than wine), until he felt like he was about to pass out, resulting in him having to lay on a cool leather couch for almost two hours. He hadn’t gotten the results for two days, during which he was forced to eat shapeless and tasteless beige mush for ‘his own safety’. Dan had never wanted to murder anyone more than at that moment.

After the results were finally posted through his dorm door, he’d been allowed to digest foods high in iron and vitamins such as eggs and a whole shit-load of red meat. 

Oh yeah, and a mandatory cup of pigs blood every week.

Dan groaned and nestled his head on his arms, slumping down fully onto the desk, his painstakingly straightened hair flopping over his crossed arms.

If there was anything Dan wished he could change about vampires, it was the bloodlust. Despite quenching his intense hunger pains for a short period of time, they left him woozy and almost drunk-like, lolling about on his bedsheets in a clouded daze. Not to mention the serious moral crisis he was inevitably to have afterwards, really if -

Dan was suddenly snapped out of his dimming thoughts by a sharp prod by his ribcage, pointed and round like someone had tried to stab him with a pencil. Or a small stake. Oh god- was he being murdered? 

With that thought wailing like an alarm blaring in the centre of his skull, dan slowly picked himself up from the desk, blinking blearily against the harsh artificial lights and turning himself around so he faced his potential attacker.

‘Nghh?” 

“Chris Kendall. Any chance you could try and seduce the teacher to get us out of this lesson? I’ve already tried and failed, and I'm so fucking bored I can feel my last remaining brain cells dripping out of my ears.”

Dan blinked again, now fully startled out of his thoughts, and took in Chris’ appearance. He was about the same height as Dan, but where Dan held himself in an often uncomfortable manner, slouched over and head down, this stranger had clear self-confidence, his chin pointed slightly upwards and his back flush against the back of his chair. He had a square jaw and sharp features partially hidden by his long, messy honey hair, and green eyes that reminded Dan of swimming pools in the summer. His uniform was carefree, shirt untucked and a hoodie tied around his waist, the epitome of ‘chill’.

However, there was something about him that Dan just couldn’t quite put his finger on. Chris almost looked… fake. As if what he was seeing was simply a hologram: a photorealistic painting you only notice isn’t real after intensive studying.

“Take a photo, it’ll last longer”, Chris said, his voice friendly but with a hint of tiredness, as if he was used to Dan’s behaviour.

“Sorry”, Dan smiles sheepishly, focusing his eyes on the safety of the floor, avoiding Chris’ dark green ones.

“Its okay”, Chris brightens up again, any traces of wariness leaving his voice. “So about that deal?”

Dan laughs loudly, attracting the glares of other sleep-deprived teens. The teacher still drones on.

“Can't say I'm any good at seducing, but I could probably scare him to death by revealing my sleeping habits.”

“Ah, classic murder weapon of a young and stressed student. I’m in if you need a hand”

“Great. You can hide the body if he mentions commas one more time.”

Chris chuckles at that one, finally earing the boys a glare from the teacher. They both a cough nervously, making a show of turning back to equally bare ivory paper. The teacher, seeming calmed, turns back to his ink-stained whiteboard, and it is not long until a crumpled white ball of paper lands on his desk. He unravels it, long fingers playing at the edges as he reads.

‘You seem like a loser. I like you. Join me and my friends at lunch?’

Dan grins and pockets the note, feeling a strange sense of self-gratification. Suddenly, this school doesn't seem too bad anymore.


End file.
